My Mom Taught Me...

Have you had your mother teach you some strange things? Mine has. Let me share you some of the things I learned from her….


TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE:"If you're going to fight with each other, do it outside - I just finished cleaning!"


TIME TRAVEL:"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"LOGIC:"Because I said so, that's why."


FORESIGHT:"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."


IRONY:"Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about."


The science of OSMOSIS:"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"


CONTORTIONISM:"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"


STAMINA:"You'll sit there 'til all that spinach is finished."

WEATHER:"It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."


How to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you; would you listen then?"


HYPOCRISY:"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times - Don't Exaggerate!!!"


THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."


BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:"Stop acting like your father!"


ENVY:"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"Yep! She is kind of wierd, alright!